I just got home from working nearly 13 hours so I’m not feeling particularly chatty but this was a great week in new tuneage so here I am on a Wednesday night, about to tell you a story and post another solid playlist. All for the love of music!

As most of you know, I have a pretty fun “real job” working with hilarious kid-lets. Well today, the BEST thing happened at our morning teaming meeting; I was handed a new referral for a nugget who has the same name of one of my favorite rappers, like, his real birth certificate name is that of a popular hip hop artist. For privacy/HIPAA’s sake, let’s call him DJ Khaled. Note: this is not his name and Khaled is not one of my favorite rappers but this little nickname will make my story-telling easier. Since this morning, all I’ve been thinking about is how fun the addition of a munchkin with a rapper’s name is going to make my job.

Where’s Jenna? Oh she’s at DJ Khaled’s ’til 3.

Whoaaaa, you clearly need to monitor DJ Khaled’s sugar intake.

Busy, busy day of appointments. Brian at noon, Steven at 1, and DJ Khaled at 2.

I heard DJ Khaled was a real little jerk this week.

Hi there, can I please speak with DJ Khaled’s mom or dad?

This is going to be reaaaaaaal entertaining. It’s one of the greatest work related wins so far in 2016. Very KEY to my laughter and happiness.

These Wednesday playlists are also very key to my week so, in the words of a very wise DJ, “They don’t want you to jet ski”. Whoops, wrong quote. I meant to say, “Annnnoooother one.”

XO

-Jenna

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There were a lot of great releases this week but, to be honest, I am still bumping last Wednesday’s playlist with some of these new tracks peppered in. Yeah, I rock to my own playlists and say things like, “Dammmn, this is a fire mix. Who’s the genius who put these bangerzzz together?” The basey beats and “drops” in a number of last week’s tracks are sounding noooice on my brand-spankin’-new Bose® speaker. LIFESTYLE FLEX ALERT!!

Can you imagine being a legit, I-make-a-living-off-of-blogging blogger straight bragging about everything you own and saying stupid sheeeit to get free swag and all-inclusive vacations?

This Bose® speaker is rad but how will I ever listen to tunes outside of my baller crib? Oh, you make wireless headphones? Peeerrrf, send me a pair and I’ll absolutely post a cozy-girl selfie of me listening to music while longingly staring at my latte art.

Pshhh, you call that blob of radioactive sugar a macaroon? Fly me to Paris’ Les Marquis de Ladurée and I’ll show you what’s up.

*Throwing a churro back in a Disney employee’s face* What is this dusty cinnamon log you’re trying to feed me? Garbage! That’s certainly not what Chocolateria San Gines in Madrid is serving con chocolate. Americans, am I right?

She’s cold as ice, folks. It’s obvious that if blogging fame was my reality I would be a chunky beeotch with no fixed address y’all would hate. You should be thankful I only run a mediocre blog that my friends, family, and a few blokes in Australia and the UK read. Instead of constantly globetrotting and gaining mad lbs, I’m planted here in Oregon bringing you another ten tracks I thought were pretty chill this week.

Amuse-toi bien,

XO

-Jenna

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I was supes lame this past weekend and stayed in everyday catching up on paperwork and snapping out of my Cali vacation mode. My pile of work, coupled with a lack of sunshine and groceries, was a harsh reality. I was sustaining myself on a diet of apples, frozen berries, and herbal tea because I refuse to go shopping when I’m in beast mode. Good news is that I’m straight thriving now and during these trying times laying low, I was able to discover all of la musique unknown. No jokes, the majority of the artists on this playlist only have a couple hundred followers on their Facebook fan pages and one artist even linked his personal FB from his Soundcloud hahaha like, you’d have to friend request him if you wanted to follow his music. Best ever. Could you imagine the days when Kanye Omari West’s fan page was all up in the FB feed of a couple hundred of his Chi city homies pissing them off to no end with his arrogance? A time when Aubrey Graham’s 416 woes were like, “I dunno, man, wheelchair Jimmy is just too Canadian to be a legit rapper but sure, I’ll throw *air quotes* “Drake” a follow just to be nice.”?

She says they miss the old Drake. Girl, don’t tempt me.

I CAN’T…EVEN, as the basics would say. Anyway, there is a lot of gold on this week’s ‘list so you should give the artists you like a follow and start spreading the news; You seem like quality humans and they could clearly use the “friends”.

Get into it,

XO

-Jenna

P.s. Did anyone else have ‘Ye’s ‘Real Friends & No More Parties in LA’ on a rotation this weekend? Or does it just speak to me because it’s my current reality? Byeeeee LA.

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New year, new blog post, more new music, and the same old weirdo bringing it all to you. I hope you had a wonderful holiday and missed me during my fortnight off gallivanting around California. I love the golden state with all of its sunny beaches, beautiful humans, celebs, amazing shopping, colorful sunsets, Disneyland magic, cheap tacos, and TRAFFIC. ALL OF THE TRAFFIC. EVERY DAMN DAY. ALL DAY LONG. Even talking about it stresses me out and I wasn’t driving slash slept through most of it and woke up when we reached our destinations hours later. Shout outs to my chauffeurs for keeping it 1hunid!. Anyways, I’m rested (thanks to a myriad of car naps) and I’m feeling happy back home in my fav the beaver state. I’m excited to bring you a new playlist of ten tracks I’ve liked this past week…or maybe three weeks, whatever, who’s counting? She’s back, folks.

HAPPY 2016!!

XO

-Jenna

P.s. The first track on this playlist isn’t new but by now you should know I’m really into NoMBe and it seemed fitting with my past two weeks in Cali. Plus, the very end of that track…Daaaaang. Repeat.

To be honest, she’s a liar full of promise

She thinks her Rolex makes her timeless

Her famous friends think she’s harmless

I’d burn the bridge with her on it

P.p.s. Total tangent but did you know that the original voices of Mickey and Minnie Mouse were married in real life? If that doesn’t make you happy, you’re officially a lost cause. Feel free to use that fact to impress someone at the next party; You can thank me when you score the digits like, “Hey guuuurl, you like Disney facts?” Not at all creepy.

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I don’t know if any of you die-hards would’ve noticed but the title track on this week’s playlist was actually on last week’s ‘list but it was deleted a few hours after I posted it. I threw in an okay replacement jam to keep with the ten song theme but I’ve been vibing to Night Job all week hoping Bas would just post the damn thing. That Shlohmo x Jeremih sample is too fresh! This Soundcloud disappearing act seems to be a running theme with new rap music; it gets leaked by all kinds of sites then repeatedly reported and deleted until the artist decides to release it for real. I’d probably play that same hard-to-get scenario if I was a rapper just to keep things fresh and frustrating for my fans. I think I’d make a pretty quality rapper, actually. This is something I think about often but one major detail always has me stuck, what would my signature “thing” be? Most of my favorites have that special something:

  • Jadakiss thinks everything is humorous and constantly yells, “HaHAAAA!”
  • Pusha T is disgusted with himself and how amazing his life is now that he’s not cooking and distributing bricks. “YEEECH” is his statement of choice a.k.a I’m murdering the scene in my post drug-dealer life.
  • Action Bronson sounds like Ghostface and he’s a little overweight (Fine, he’s probs obese). He talks about how errrything he eats is f’n delicious and I’d have to agree with him.
  • Eminem is white and gets away murders.
  • Jay is married to Bey.
  • Everyone hates Kanye West because he’s a terrible human but everyone hates themselves even more because they love his music so much.
  • Lil Wayne‘s skills include having babies with groupies and not dying. The dude is on a perpetual codeine and promethazine high but somehow stays alive. He is also thriving with all kinds of young moola, baby, despite the plethora of child support payments I assume he’s dishing out.
  • Drake has a handsome face, impeccable hair line, and killer dance moves…Drake hands are always and forever my go to dance when I’m partying recklessly. Plus, he’s Canadian so almost everyone likes him because he’s nice…and then makes fun of him behind his back because they’re jealous that he had access to poutine and Timbits his entire life.
  • DJ Khaled used to just yell his name repeatedly at obnoxiously high volumes, “DEEEEE JAAAAY KHAAALEEEEEDDDD!!”, but now he’s the primary source of inspo in my life. You’re right, Khaled; I is a genius and we is da best. Thanks for making me feel appreciated on some real levels.

You, my readers, are also DA BEST. After you’re done listening to this week’s playlist, start brainstorming ideas about what my rap persona could look like so I can get started on this career change sooner than later. I appreesh your input. You very smart. You a Genius. You loyal. I appreesh you.

xo

Jenna, the future best rapper alive.

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